Tag: reality

#9

aconway17

I have been at home for the last two weeks due to the pandemic occurring in the world right now. So I have been trying to keep myself busy. The first thing I did was redo my room by painting it then rearranging my furniture. But after that I didn’t really know what to do other than go on social media and watch hours of TV that I am sure have definitely rot my brain. I had to read a book for my history class I’m currently taking, but I did not want to read it, even if it did seem a little interesting. Whenever someone plops something down in front of me and says that I have to do it, it seems about sixty percent less exciting to do. So, while I was procrastinating reading this book, I rearranged my bookshelf that I have in my room and I realized I had gotten a couple books over winter break that I hadn’t had the chance to read yet. So I pulled out one of them and started reading it in the morning and finished it that night. I get very sucked into books because sometimes I want to be a world that isn’t my own for a couple hours. The book I read was in my favorite series and it definitely was not the best book in the series, but it was good and still has my mind on it right now. I can’t wait to read the next book just to see how the author plans to figure everything out that is happening with the main character at the end of the last book.

After I read this book I continued on with another. Again, procrastinating reading the book I actually had to read. Eventually when I was a couple chapters in, I finally decided to read the book that I needed to read for my history class. As I was working up to reading it I was dreading every minute of it. I did not like the book and just didn’t want to read it, even if at first I thought it would be interesting. When I was buying the book for this class I looked at reviews that people gave and everyone was saying along the same things, that it is one of the best books they have ever read. So, automatically I was going in with an idea that this was just going to be a fantastic book, but I always forget to determine what type of books these people truly enjoy reading. I prefer to read books that are science fiction or romance. I enjoy a story line that I can think, dream, and expand on in my mind. This book that I had to read was historical fiction and it was based in a time period that was extremely discriminatory towards African Americans. When I read books with this premise, it just makes me sad and angry that people had the audacity to treat another human being like they were lesser simply because of the color of their skin. It was just hard to read something that caused people pain because there was a racial hierarchy in this time period and I never want to return to this way of life. I read science fiction or romance novels about a world that is not our own most of the time, or at least not what my world feels like. So, I feel like I can escape what may be happening in my life and enjoy reading something happy and uplifting. I don’t really know what this blog post is really about. I think I have just had so much social distancing that this is the first time I have had the chance to speak about something other than how I want to return to my school in Ohio so badly. So a distraction of books or redecorating is my way of escaping from the reality that is going on today and I am grateful for these resources.

#4

aconway17

Sometimes life is the worst. I really wish everything would just go how I planned it. Like remembering to write these posts. I thought this would be a great way to help me express my thoughts, even if it is to people that I can’t see. But this is turning out to be harder than expected. Stress has been a daunting thing in my life. I have been struggling with understanding how to control it, but somehow cannot succeed. I have taken on a little bit more than I can chew this semester. I have decided to take on eighteen credit hours when I have never done this, got involved with two new clubs, and started an officer position in my sorority. I thought this would be a great way to immerse myself within the University of Dayton community and become more connected with people. I planned it out to be this glamorous experience that I would be so proud of myself for doing. But so far it is turning out to be the opposite. I am having a hard time trying to decide where and how to spend my time. I think of myself and holding school to a higher standard considering the fact that I want to become a teacher, but this priority has seemed to lesson this semester. I am disappointed that I have allowed this to happen and it needs to change. I have been giving more time to my sorority, the clubs I’m a part of, and overall allowing myself to stress out. This isn’t how I want my college experience to go. I wish it would go how I planned it all out in my head. To get a 4.0 GPA, succeed in my position in my sorority, volunteer around the city, have fun with friends, and so much more. But realistically this cannot happen. Life doesn’t work how you plan it and it is hard to accept this reality. I like to think that everything happens for a reason, but for some reason I am having a hard time believing that not doing well in school, being stressed out by something I used to enjoy, not getting along with roommates, and a lot more is for a reason. I just have to trust that everything will work out in the end, but we’ll see.